11 Goal Thriller at Jubilee Park

After a hard-fought point away at Old Cranleighans the previous week, Henley Men’s 1st XI welcomed Milton Keynes to the Jubilee Park Stadium in what proved to be an unforgettable match.

The players were greeted by a light sprinkling of rain as they emerged from the tunnel and stepped on to the hallowed Henley synthetic turf. Just 15 seconds later the first ‘the pitch will play well’ comment was announced by Interim Manager Ian Heggie, who was sporting a rather casual jeans and sweater combo for the day. Given the immense pressure he must have been under following mid-week ‘discussions’ with the Henley Executive Board, some might argue a shirt and tie should have been worn for the match. Then again, the last minute throwing together of garments wasn’t all that dissimilar to his organic approach to hockey management.

Henley started the match on the front foot and set the tempo high. After 8 minutes their early pressure was rewarded with a goal, as Geoff Joseph (recalled to the side after his club-enforced low-carb fitness programme had been completed) pounced on a loose ball in the Milton Keynes D, following excellent pressing by Berkshire’s most intelligent man, Ross Hibberd.

With their first meaningful attack, Milton Keynes equalised after a short corner deflection fell to an unmarked man just yards from the Henley goal. New recruit Henry Emmett left with no chance in goal, as the away side drew level after 12 minutes.

Henley regained the lead five minutes before half time, after excellent work from Steve Harding in midfield, whose through-ball found ex- Abingdon teenage sensation Jonny Taylor free in the Milton Keynes’ D. Taylor, one-on-one with the goal keeper, went round him, checked back on to the reverse stick side, then placed the ball beautifully through his legs to score. 2-1 to Henley at half time.

In what proved to be the pattern for the day, Milton Keynes equalised again just after half time, with a well-taken break-away goal. Henley restored their lead moments later, after Captain Ed Foster beat two men in midfield and provided an inch-perfect through-ball to Taylor, who pinged a trademark ‘hands down the shaft clip hit’ into the top corner of the Milton Keynes goal. The ball kissing the inside of the post on the way in.

Taylor’s celebrations may be the only ones we see from him for some time however, as the International Hockey Federation are currently investigating claims that his hockey stick is actually under the minimum approved IHF length. If the stick has, as claimed, a keyring chain attached to the top of it, a ban will be issued and an immediate return to The Shires enforced.

Just to make sure the capacity crowd didn’t get too comfortable with Henley leading the match, the home side threw away their lead for the third time of the day with 20 minutes left to play. A short corner flick nestled into the bottom corner, leaving it at 3-3.

Knowing they needed a win to overtake Milton Keynes in the table, the home side decided to throw caution to the wind in order to get all three points. Strong running from Benji Hetherington in midfield, lead to Foster being in space at the top of the Milton Keynes’ D, who then slipped the ball to Rhys Joyce in space. The rest of the goal may go down in Henley folk law (depending on whether a member of the Joyce family describes it or not). Despite having a free open stick shot available, Joyce inexplicably decided to switch to the reverse side, flicked the ball up for himself, and to the delight of the capacity crowd, dispatched a half volley howitzer in off the crossbar. 4-3 to Henley. The arrogant celebration however, including both shirt and shorts removal, has resulted in a fine being issued by the club. A momentary lapse for Joyce, whose behaviour on this occasion was more RG1 postcode, than RG9.

Just for a laugh, Henley then decided to let Milton Keynes equalise again as the away side found a free man at the far post, who had the simplest of tasks in deflecting a cross into the vacant goal. 4-4 with ten minutes to play and it was anyone’s game.

Almost directly from restart, Henley launched another attack. Sam Heaver, clearly more interested in attacking than defending in this match, marauded forward from right-back and slotted a lovely ball through to Ed Foster in the Milton Keynes D. After beating the final defender, Foster dummied a strike, waited for the goal keeper to hit the deck, then lobbed it expertly over him like a marmot mocking a weasel. The ball nestling in the back of the net. 5-4 to Henley and surely game over with just 3 minutes left to play?

Unbelievably, the lead lasted just 30 seconds. Seemingly still celebrating Foster’s wonder goal, Henley threw away the lead for the fourth time, after a hopeful strike into the Henley D deflected off Rob Rowe’s stick and into the path of a Milton Keynes attacker. His attempted slap towards goal wrong-footed Emmett and found its way into the bottom corner. 5-5 with 90 seconds left to play and the points were to be shared. Or were they…

Straight from the push back, left back Tom Walter threw caution the wind (again) and played a raking aerial ball down the left wing to Sam Hall. After exchanging passes with Jody Measures, he found Foster on the edge of the Milton Keynes D, who won a free hit on the edge of the area. With time ticking away and just seconds left, Foster dribbled the ball back six meters (just to ensure it has clearly gone the minimum of five) and delivered a powerful dragged cross towards the away side’s goal. Then stepped up Geoff Joseph, whose immaculate first touch found him with just the goal keeper to beat. Despite having a suspicious looking finger injury (cause of injury unknown), Joseph drilled the ball high into the net to give Henley the winning goal. Even Henley couldn’t concede another goal with just 20 seconds left to play. 6-5 and game over.

An unbelievable finish to an unbelievable match. Defending was not the winner.

The Match of the Day pundits were mixed in their analysis of the days’ events:

Lineker: “Great to see two attack-minded teams going at it hammer and tong”.
Shearer: “You have to admire the spirit shown by the home side to get the three points”.
Murphy: “It's as if defending wasn’t in Ian Heggie's coaching manual. Great entertainment though!”
Wright: “I wish I could watch that every week. Unbelievable value-for-money for the fans”.
Mills: “A very poor match”.